A Time To Change Perspectives....

I look at the date of my last blog entry, has it really been almost 2 weeks? It feels, in some regards, like it's been two days. But, on the flip side a feeling of eternity comes to mind.

I believe in my heart that for the most part, I've had nothing positive to share in this blog. The valley ever deepens and it seems as if we aren't even at the bottom of it yet. I've cut a great deal of my communication off from my mentors and friends who had so gently but firmly redirected my steps back to walking in sync with God and living my life in faith of what HE has in store and not what my own eyes see. So many of those precious mentors and friends I fear would feel as if my effort to continue my walk was loosing it's fire, passion, & heart filled desire to finally once and for all...stay the course and fight the good fight.

I hear people reminding me of Job's life....and I can relate. I hear people telling me again of Paul's life with a thorn in his side....and I can relate. But have I picked up the Word for guidance and for strength to endure? No! Why? I have no idea!!

I have been so deeply drawn to Sheila Walsh and her books! As of today, there isn't a single emotional valley or season that she has walked in that I can't identify with on a very personal level. Her victory over her depression and my three precious children is what keeps me here every day. It's a discipline for my mind to keep it focused on the good in myself and the promise that God would never in a million years trade me in for another. I am at the end of myself and I think that is the best place to open my eyes and see the start of Him.

I pray for strength to endure the next few months as our lives as a family is restructured to a new form. I pray for patience and peace to rule my heart. I pray for the lives of those who have so graciously and endlessly poured into me that they would experience the blessings that can only flow from the hands of God. I pray for my children, that they not be affected more than they have been by this and that God would keep them out of the valley and in His protection until I can stand again feeling honored that I am a mommy. I feel so blessed to be entrusted to raise these three lives

So, friends and family, I return to you again to ask you for your coveted prayers and for just a small amount of continued patience with me. Many of you have traveled this roller coaster life with me and your loyalty to me is far more appreciated and valued than what I could express here right now. I honor you though ~ and I know in the future, God is going to provide the perfect platform for me to openly thank you each.

I love all of you!!! I miss you all immensely!!

In His Grip~